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Issue with a coworker

So, the new job is really spiffy. I am working as a mac/pc tech (quelle surprise!)

However, I am working in an office that is dominantly male. The Team lead is female and there is me and one other tech who is female. The rest of the 9 person team is male. There are a couple in particular with that I am having personality conflicts with.

(Let me caveat this with something - I have been extremely lucky my whole life to not really come up against any major push back from coworkers about my intelligence or knowledge. Or, if I did I was so naive at the time it wasn't really a problem. So the common issue strong, smart women frequently have with their male counterparts talking down to them? Never really happened to me. Yes, I know I am very fortunate.)

There is one that causes me to sit back and think, "Did he really just say that?", "Did he really just talk over me like my knowledge is worthless?", "Did he really just cut me out of the conversation for no reason??", and other similar things.

My first instinct is to take him aside and explain how his thoughtlessness is affecting me and how amazingly pissed off I am at him for it. However, I would like to think I have learned from my mistakes, and I know that would most likely just cause more issues in the long run. I also don't think he would listen to a word I say. I have spoken to the team lead about this briefly at one point and she may have said something to him, so now it really only occurs when she is not there.

My conundrum is this: should I try to talk to him about it or go to my manager (female) and feel like a whiny baby cause I cannot stick up for myself? And do I care if I become the office bitch for being truthful? Or am I just being emo?

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( 2 Tummy Rubs — Pet Angela? )
lilmartha2
Jun. 1st, 2011 12:55 pm (UTC)
It sounds as if your team lead has already spoken to this co-worker about his behavior. Now you need to start documenting. Every time it happens, write down the date, time, and details. After the second or third episode get back to your lead with the facts. This man needs to treat all co-workers with respect and it may take intervention by your HR department. It's not your job to change his behavior.

You don't mention the other female tech - you might take her to lunch and see if she's had a similar experience with the man and how she handled it. My guess is she's chosen to ignore it and that's why he's still getting away with such infantile behavior. Maybe the two of you will want to present your facts to the team lead together.

kittiekats
Jul. 17th, 2011 01:07 am (UTC)
Hey, it's Lynn from Melbourne. I'm not much into writing here as much as I used to but I'm trying to get more active. Add me if you like and drop me a line and tell me whatcha been up to. :-)
( 2 Tummy Rubs — Pet Angela? )

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    Hey! I hope you thrill at Colorado! WHen you know your physical or mailing address, could you pass it along? Thank you! We all think of you with love! Robert
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    Congratulations! This kid is going to have a great time!

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    I am so happy for you! What a wonderful thing to wake up to on a monday morning. Yes, I am a week late, but that is about right in bella-time.

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    im just trying to get caught up on LJ a little now, so i just saw this and i'm so sorry hon. :( beautiful pictures though. a beautiful girl. i'm so glad she was lucky to have a happy long life with…
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